The Alphabet Project: C is for...

Cannibal Women In The Avocado Jungle Of Death (1989)

Marlow is an ambitious and adventurous sailor who is employed by an English trading company and sent to an African colony. There he travels up the river, visiting the trading stations who barters for ivory with the natives. On his journey he is told about a man named Kurtz whose station is the one furthest up the river, deep in the African jungle. Some talk of him in awe, others in admiration, but they all seem to fear him. As Marlow gets closer and closer to Kurtz he understands that the man has gone insane and is now doing the most horrible and blasphemous deeds. Based on Joseph Conrad's classic novel about greed and insanity. Okay, I'm just kidding. Actually, here is the real plot. The U.S. government, eager to protect the nation's avocado supplies, recruits feminist professor Margo Hunt (Shannon Tweed) to make contact with the Piranha Women , an all-female tribe who believe men are only good as a source of food. The Piranha Women live in the uncharted Avocado Jungle (the westernmost outpost is San Bernardino) and are led by a crazed feminist, Dr. Kurtz (Adrienne Barbeau). Accompanying Dr. Hunt on her trip are Jim (Bill Maher), a guide of questionable competence, and Bunny (Karen Mistal), a student of unquestionable incompetence. Hilarity ensues.

Trivia: The film was shot primarily in the avocado groves maintained by the University of California at Riverside (UCR), which the university uses for horticultural experiments.

Okay, if you didn't recognise the first plot, it is from the Heart of Darkness (also the basic plot for Apocalypse Now), and the reason I used that was because this movie is a parody of that plot, even down to Dr. Kurtz the leader of the Piranha Women (the movie never actually calls them cannibal women, but they do eat men...allegedly). This is actually pretty funny at points and generally funny most of the time. Bill Mahar even has a full on Bugs Bunny moment while sitting in a large stewpot full of vegetables.

Well, congratulations to Impman on guessing correctly. As a reward he will be able to pick a movie for me to watch and review. He has already given me his choice and I am going to give him a twofer as they fit into the Halloween theme for this month. Here are the other guesses:

Caddyshack - An exclusive golf course has to deal with a brash new member and a destructive dancing gopher.

The Cannonball Run - A wide variety of eccentric competitors participate in a wild and illegal cross-country car race.

Captain Valedor Versus The Spider Queen - Captain Valedor and his compatriots invade the treacherous Spider Queen's fortress in this 14th chapter of an otherwise non-existent serial. Will they be able to stop her and her monstrous spider warrior before the peaceful planet of Tranquilia is doomed?

Captain Celluloid Vs The Film Pirates - Captain Celluloid battles the evil Master Duper and his criminal gang, the League of Film Pirates, who plan to hijack copies of classic films, copy them and sell them to desperate film collectors all over the world.

The Cheapest Movie Ever Made - So cheap, it doesn't even have a plot.

Cheerleader Ninjas - Four perky, clueless cheerleaders from the Happy Valley High Hamsters are mistakenly blamed by the meddling...

Conkers Bad Fur Day - After a rough night of drinking beer,conker wakes up stranded in a hungover.Conker meets new friends...

Cornman: American Vegetable Hero - A loser develops the ability to communicate with corn and becomes a crazy super hero. He battles the evil villain, Dr. Hoe, who wants to own all the corn in the world.

Cat's Eye - A stray cat is the linking element of three tales of suspense and horror.

Click - "Click" focuses on a workaholic architect who finds a universal remote that allows him to fast-forward and rewind to different parts of his life. Complications arise when the remote starts to overrule his choices.

Carry On Films - ?

Captain America - Frozen in the ice for decades, Captain America is freed to battle against arch-criminal, The Red Skull.

Charlie's Angels - Three women, detectives with a mysterious boss, retrieve stolen voice-ID software, using martial arts, tech skills, and sex appeal.

Cannonball! - This is another story of the secret Coast to Coast auto race across America The only rule is, the first to finish is the winner...

The Calamari Wrestler - Not quite like anything else!

Carried Away - Joseph Svenden is a middle-aged schoolteacher who lives on a farm with his dying mother. In his simple life there are no excitements...

Catch Me If You Can - A true story about Frank Abagnale Jr. who, before his 19th birthday, successfully conned millions of dollars worth of checks as a Pan Am pilot, doctor, and legal prosecutor.

Catfish In Black Bean Sauce - Dwayne and his older sister Mai are adults: Mai is married to Vinh, Dwayne is about to propose to Nina...

The Cat's Meow - Semi-true story of the Hollywood murder that occurred at a star-studded gathering aboard William Randolph Hearst's yacht in 1924.

Cider House Rules - A compassionate young man, raised in an orphanage and trained to be a doctor there, decides to leave to see the world.

Cinderella Man - The story of James Braddock, a supposedly washed up boxer who came back to become a champion and an inspiration in the 1930s.

City Of Angels - Inspired by the modern classic, Wings of Desire, City involves an angel who is spotted by a doctor in an operating room.

Clockers - Strike is a young city drug pusher under the tutelage of drug-lord Rodney Little, who, when not playing...

Clockstoppers - A teenager accidentally activates a machine that enables him to speed up his body so that other people seem to be standing still.

Collateral - A cab driver finds himself the hostage of an engaging contract killer as he makes his rounds from hit to hit during one night in LA. He must find a way to save both himself and one last victim.

Count Of Monte Cristo - A young man, falsely imprisoned by his jealous "friends," escapes and uses a hidden treasure to exact his revenge.

Okay, "D" movies everyone.